Bad Notes

Okay I'm sure there are worse things in this world than sitting through a screening in which the notes just keep on coming, but geez. It's tough in my job to sit and have something you've worked on for so long get torn apart so easily. Which is what happened yesterday. Not that the notes weren't spot on or anything. Unfortunately they were. Of course I've had worse. When I was in college, a screening one time went so badly that the director walked out of the room, leaving me behind, humiliated and scarred for life. Which is when I learned to grow some thick skin, which is easier said than done. Because man, right when I think my job is a walk in the park, something like this happens that shows me there's a reason I'm making money at this. It's hard. It's really effin hard. And now I have three days to sit and focus and churn out some genius stuff, or I fear my job is on the line. So of course I'm motivated now - which is definitely one upside to this whole thing. But I have a lot of people counting on me, which makes this whole thing worse when I let, even for a single second, the thought slip into my head that maybe I'm just not good enough. Which if you ask my mom, is just not true. And if I had a weekend before the cut was due I'd feel better, but I don't. So I'm chaining myself to my desk today and buckling down and going to figure this thing out. It's days like this I wonder why in the world I went into this crazy business when you are repeatedly setting yourself up for someone out there to Mitchum Huntzburger you.

Anyway, that's my current thoughts on my flagellation yesterday. That and, why do I insist on dressing up for these things! When you are being torn to shreds, it's almost worse when you're wearing cute shoes.