Dude! Your Car's Been Toad!

So the good news is, I'm officially nocturnal. The bad news? The sun is rising and I'm wide awake. Maybe not wide awake. I'm a little punchy. (For instance, I currently think replacing "towed" with "toad" is hilarious!) Further proof of this is when I pulled into the driveway a few minutes ago, talking to my east coast sister on the phone, I shushed her and insisted there was a rattlesnake in my front yard. Upon further investigation, it was the neighbors sprinklers.

Today, while all of you were at work, and I was spending my day lounging waiting for my nightshift to begin, I watched as a car was towed from my street. I wondered what exactly their indiscretion had been, but figured it was probably just a run-of-the-mill repossession or something.

Well, tonight, or this morning rather, upon returning home from work, I took my dog out for a tiny little walk. How can a tiny walk be little you ask? Well, it's to the street and back. She pees, yawns, leads me back inside. There you have it: tiny little.

Okay so I'm walking cautiously to the street, (watching out for rattlesnakes mind you), and I see a man in a suit walking down the sidewalk. It's one of those situations where the person doesn't see you, but you know when they do, it's going to startle them. Well, right before I got to my fake-cough to announce my presence stage, he noticed me and almost seems to duck away from me at first. It was odd. He looked like your standard business man, nice suit and tie, going in for an early morning in the office. But he was looking for something. And I watched him as he passed my house, and looked back confused. Then it struck me: he was looking for his car.

A few things. First of all, where had this man been? This car was towed around 2pm yesterday afternoon, and now it is 5:30am. He seemed a little unfamiliar with the area, and although I certainly don't recognize everyone in my neighborhood, I had never seen this guy before. And if he was a business man, as one would assume from his attire, wouldn't he have had to work yesterday? I ponder the possibilities because, let's face it, I'm nosey and want to know everything about people that strike my fancy. Okay, "fancy" is not the right word there. Or maybe it is. What I mean is, people who I find interesting or intriguing.

Okay, secondly, this car was not a super-fancy car. It was not a Rolls or Benz. (Yes, I just said "Rolls" and "Benz".) This guy seems well enough off that he wouldn't be getting his Honda repossessed. Especially if he was the over-achieving business man I painted him as in my first impression.

Thirdly, and this only occured to me after the fact, but was he reaching for a gun or something when he saw me? He seemed to go for something. Maybe it was pepper-spray or his pocket-protector, but he sure was jumpy.

So what does this spell out? Sketchy.

i decided to toss out my first impression and formulate a new one.

On Sunday evening he went to dinner was some of his associates. They discussed their sketchy business matters and what not. "Swifty", as he prefers to be called, is a major drug addict. The other members invite him over to one of their houses and insist he park miles away. Here, they go on an all night drug binge where they play a fierce and psychedelic game of D&D. Soon enough, Sunday evening turns into Monday morning and they're still at it. Finally, around 5pm, they all pass out. He wakes up at four, still in his suit from dinner, and decides it's time to head home. He begins his walk, nerves still rattled from the drugs. He's paranoid and jumpy, drug hungover and tired. He gets to the street where he's sure he parked his car, and can't seem to find it. He's so busy looking for said car, he doesn't see the girl walking down her driveway. When he sees movement from the corner of his eye, he turns and reaches for his sword, (that he's sure really exists---or it did a few hours ago anyway), sure that the dragon he had been fighting hours before had returned for round seventeen. He's startled to find that his sword has disappeared but is temporarily relieved that the dragon had also seemed to vanish due to the presence of a mortal and her K-9. He returns to his task at hand: finding his car. Confused, he wonders if he had sold it while on the binge, as it seems to be nowhere around. He then wonders if "Quantum"'s spell had actually worked. He whips out his phone to investigate the situation. Only to be reminded by his pal "Lark" that he stopped paying for his car to save up for his fantasy character figurines and premium rocks. "Rats", he thinks. "Not again."

On another note: I wonder if dogs don't think that we kiss them because we don't lick their faces?