Thanksgiving Playlist (subject to change without notice)

You Better Google Me, Baby

New favorite song.



I mean seriously, you can Google me!

Also, out of all of the Google searches that have resulted in someone coming to my page, the winner for the most returns is "avocado coffee". No joke.

"You can find me in Webster under the word star." This song makes me want to go out to a dance club, and if you know me, that's huge!

Work Sucks (Which Means My Social Life Will Be Heating Up Soon)

For as long as I remember, I've had this odd balance---


I'm stopping midsentence to say that due to overdosing on "The Fresh Prince of Bel Air", I've started branching out on my late night television to discover that VH1 actually plays videos late at night. And Pink is on right now with her "Dear Mr President" song. And wow, I love it. I really like Pink. I have some questionable music tastes but I defend this one. Her voice is amazing. She stands for something and doesn't care what people think. She's kinda badass and I love her. I love this song and the video is so touching. Funniest line: "You've come a long way from whiskey and cocaine." Damn girl. You tell 'em.

Man, this song is really making me speechless.


Okay anyway, back to odd balance. Either work or social life is always booming. It seems when work is sucking the most, I'm enjoying some social fun times. When I'm getting promoted or something good is happening at work, I'm being stood up or a friend gets mad at me or something that puts me in the dumps. I've had a lot of work success in the past few months, but now, all of the sudden, work is totally going foul. Possibly I have spring fever now that I've gotten a promotion that doesn't quite kick in yet, but last week and present one I've managed to mess up quite a few things, or have quite a few things mess up on me.

Example? An output that used to take 2 hours, now is taking an average of 5 because of some odd graphics issue I'm having on one of the episodes. A reoccuring one that I can't figure out. I have to use a 3 hour work around. Another example? I got new footage in for the music video I was working on this fall, only for my computer to freak out, (bad hard drive maybe? this one is still a mystery), causing half of the footage to be lost. And I've made a few dumb mistakes, which has gotten my editor to be a little more short with me and not quite as warm as he once was. All these things could only mean one thing. Something fun is about to happen. Let's hope it's not got anything to do with the blind date I'm being forced onto while I'm home.

Funny story. My mom and her friend, who has a son that lives in NY, thought it would be a good idea to set us up on a blind date while we were home for the holidays. Get this: Mom wasn't even going to tell me about it. She was going to see what color shirt I was wearing and call his mom and tell her to tell him. Yeah, it was supposed to be a big secret. Luckily, my mom couldn't hold it in and told me. She's pretty serious about it, telling me that maybe if things work out I could move back to New York and get married. And hey, she adds, he makes enough money that you wouldn't have to work and could start popping out babies. She asked me, completely serious, why I was laughing.

Oh dear. My 25th birthday is looming and she is starting the fun pressure games already. Not to mention the completely inappropriate and awkward "date" she has arranged. I may ask him if he got the goats my father sent. I make a mean baked ziti so I think I'd be worth quite of few. Good news? As my friend and I were joking earlier in the evening, I could accidentally get pregnant and my mom would probably clap her hands and jump around screaming, "Finally!". Not that that is even close to being a possibility right now. But then again, work is sucking lately, so we'll just wait and see.

Full circle. I love it.

Step Away From iTunes

So since I'm already on a night schedule, I decided to just go ahead and stay up until I have to take my brother to the airport at six am. I thought it would be fun to finally set up that iTunes account I've contemplated for a while now. And I can't stop buying songs! Embarrassingly enough, the song that made me breakdown and sign up was "How Far We've Come" by Matchbox Twenty, and you know what, I'm not embarrassed! Judge me if you must, but I like Matchbox Twenty, 20, or even, XX. They were my first concert that I chose to go to, (I got dragged to quite a few in my younger years - usually famed country music stars).

Anyway, the point is, I need to get away from iTunes. I keep thinking of songs I want, need, and have to have.

Instead of purchasing songs I've convinced myself I can't live without, I'll tell you how I got a cruel universe joke played on me tonight. I have days when I wake up and feel like I'm going to see a celebrity. Today was one of those days. When I have my day planned out, I just know that probability is higher in some places, and there's a certain ratio that can get my hopes up.

A friend and I went to a resturant in which last time I was there, we saw four celebrities, of various degrees of course. Favorite sighting of that day was Sean Gunn - yes my Gilmore heart always wins out. Anyway, today, nada.

We happened to go by some other places that I would consider high probability, and still nada.

Well, my brother came over tonight and we went to get some dinner in Los Feliz. Well, my little Gilmore-loving heart nearly exploded as a Lauren Graham wanna-be walked in the diner we settled on. Los Feliz and I have a history of these run-ins and this woman was seriously freakily similar to Lauren Graham. Freakily. This woman had a nose (job?) that, if I'm not mistaken, was a replica of LG's nose. Strange thing to notice, but it was that and the hair that had me really thinking it was her. It took me a few seconds of staring before I settled on "No way". What a tease though! That would have been seriously the most amazing thing ever. Worse case scenario, this woman was LG's stand-in or something. It was the strangest thing. I felt like someone was playing a joke on me. I wish I could have gotten a picture but on the slim to none chance it was actually LG, I'm sure flash bulbs make her cagey.

Conundrum

Okay, so I'm trying to get on this night schedule thing, but I'm currently in a conundrum. I am going hiking with the roommate and our doggies at eleven a.m. tomorrow morning. I also work tomorrow night. Right now, it is one a.m. I'm trying my hardest to stay up so I'll be on my A game tomorrow night, but I'm tired. We ate a large homemade meal tonight, and have spent the evening watching hits like "Mrs. Doubtfire" and "One Fine Day" reclining on the couch. Roommate went to sleep a while ago, and my eyes are drifting shut. I'm trying to decide if I should just go to sleep now so I can wake up a little early to drink my coffee---NAP! I'm going to take a nap after hiking! Problem solved. G'night.


My Song of the Moment

A Happy Dog AND A SoTM

Woo. I've been like a regular blogger here of lately. So I have a f'in awesome SoTM, (for those of you that may be new, this is "Song of The Moment"), but first I want to start with my happy, happy doggy.

My doggy is loving our new living situation. Like loving it. She's so happy and always smiling and it makes my heart pitter-patter.

Hopper and her new campanion and housemate, Cillian, just love each other. Every morning when I open the door to my room, she exits under my feet and finds Cillian, always giving her big wet kisses. They usually run around together for a little while, much to my downstairs neighbors dismay, and with tails wagging and tongues panting, choose their respective toys. They lay down by each other, figuring out all the things that are cooler about the others' choosen toy.

My dog hasn't been this happy since before I moved to NY. It confirms that she loves living with another dog, and makes me feel that much better about my desicion to move her and I across the country. She loves the weather, and is getting used to hanging with me on the porch while I do my coffee and internet routine.

So speaking of my coffee and internet routine, this morning I opened the big window on the porch so I can hear my music. This is a first for me, but definitely something I'm going to do more often. I love the big windows in my new place. I love how open my new place is.

Well today I decided to listen to music because I found this amazing song last night, and need to be surrounded by it right now.

I found this song after reading about a fan contest for the Junior Boys. The contest was for fans to make a music video to one of the songs on the new album:




















I came across the winner, and to say the least, I was impressed. So impressed actually. This is a fan made video. And the song freaking took my socks off. I encourage you to listen. I usually don't like this kind of music, as I've said before, electronic music is not my usual cup of tea. But this takes electronic music to a very pop level, with the lyrics that burn your brain and heart:

"Cos in the morning
There's a million years to choose from.
You don't care
Just take one.
Leave a place to rest on."

If that doesn't sell you, check out this f'in video. Just awesome. Awesome. Keep in mind, this is fan made. I aspire to be so awesome.



Excuse me for being a dork, but ya'll, (reading Pamie's blog is rubbing off on me, I never say "ya'll"!), I want to see the editing timeline for this one. I'm just stumped!

And now, just for fun. One of my favorite vids of all time: U2, "Windows in the Sky" v.2

A Few Awesome Covers

Woo! Camera Obscura has a new song out! Glee! It's a cover of Abba's "Super Trouper". I'm so in love...

Check it out here!

Can I cry now? No? Why not? Alanis did what??

By Request

After my previous post, I had a request for a few samples of my favorite depressing songs. Seeing as this request came from possibly my only reader, I find it important to keep her happy. So here's my top ten in all its glory.

1. Snow Patrol and Martha Wainwright: Set Fire To The Third Bar-The soulful piano and beautiful voices of both Gary Lightbody and Martha Wainwright would put you in a trance even if they were singing about diaper changes. Of course, they aren't. They sing of a doomed relationship, perhaps a long-distance one. The great thing about these lyrics is that they are just vague enough to be able to apply to many different situations. The listener can take their own interpretation of the lyrics. For me this song is about the person who you can never get; the unrequited love.

"I'm miles from where you are. I lay down, on the cold ground. I pray that something picks me up, and sets me down, in your warm arms."

Listen To Sample

2. Bright Eyes: Gold Mined Gutted-Nearly anything by Bright Eyes has a tendency to twist the knife a little bit in your wallowing. To me, this song is all about always being so close to what you want, but never being able to get it. It's about you being your own worst enemy. The song itself is a tad eerie but not as whiny as people often claim Bright Eyes to be. Great song.

"From the sidelines, you see me run, until I'm out of breath. Living the good life, I'm left for dead. The sorrowful midwest, well I did my best, to keep my head."

Listen To Sample

3. Under The Influence of Giants-Lay Me Down-I can't say enough about this band. Every song is wonderful in its own way. The self-titled album boasts many songs that will make you dance. This one, however, is much slower and originally drew me to the band. This song is about getting comfort from a loved one. Or wanting comfort that you can't get. Love the music, love the vocals, just all in all, great song.

"Give me a sign, say it's okay. Need it to make it through the day. Give me your hand, sell me your soul. I need it so I can feel controlled."

Listen To Sample

4. Oasis: Don't Look Back in Anger (Live Version)-Oh man. This song. This song has some serious personal reasons for my adoration. It's about something ending but instead of being mad, and 'looking back in anger', you remember the good times and keep it holy for what it once was. The lyrics, "You ain't ever gonna burn my heart out" are carved on the backside of my iPod. One of my favorite songs of all time. And one of the most heart-breaking.

"You said that you've never been, but all the things that you've seen, are gonna fade away. So we start a revolution from my bed, cause you said the brains I had, went to my head. Step outside, the summertime's in bloom. Stand up beside the fireplace, take that look from off your face, cause you ain't ever gonna burn my heart out. And so Sally can wait, she knows it's too late as we're walking on by. Her soul slides away. 'Don't look back in anger', I heard you say."

Listen To Sample

Even better, the MTV Unplugged performance of this song.



5. Stars: Elevator Love Letter-Wow, another one of my favorites. To me, this song is about getting so caught up in work, and forgetting about the other aspects of your life. I'm sure this song could be taken in many ways, but that's the one that resonates most with me. Taking it at it's most literal. The song is a little more upbeat, but the melancholy vocals will break your heart.

"I'm so high for a rich girl, my heels are high, my eyes cast low. And I don't know how to love. I get too tired after midday, maybe. I take it out on my good friends, but the worst days end. Oh where would I begin?"

Listen To Sample

6. The Knife: Heartbeats-Okay all of these are in my favorites so I'm going to stop repeating that. This song is a little more upbeat in the tempo, but again, the lyrics are beautifully depressing. To me it's about a broken engagement, or promise, and the intensity that follows such a parting. A huge fight or a passionate Friends-style bonus night. Again, different interpretations. The vocals are just so touching, you think that in some parts of the song, the singer's voice is cracking. If you can't feel the emotions in this one, I'd ask about your sanity. But, hey, I'm not judging.

"One night to be confused, one night to speed up truth. We had a promise made, four hands and then away. Both under influence, we had divine scent, to know what to say. Mind is a razor blade. To cry for hands up above, to lean on, wouldn't be good enough for me, no."

I couldn't find a sample online, plus the video is super-amazing, so I just embedded it here. I'd watch once with your eyes closed, and then the second time, watching the actual video.



7. Will Oldham: New Partner-This song may not be as much depressing as it is, moving. It's almost a love song, but with such a tender beat and the groveling voice of Will Oldham, I find myself wanting to listen to this song more when I'm depressed than I'd expect. It's beautiful, and even though it is such a sweet and peaceful subject matter, it makes me want to cry.

"There's a black tinted sunset with the prettiest of skies
Lay back, lay back, rest your head on my thighs
There is some awful action that just breathes from my hand
Just breaths from a deed so exquisitely grand.

And you are always on my mind

Well, I would not have moved if I knew you were here
Its some special action with motives unclear
Now you'll haunt me, you'll haunt me
Till I've paid for what I've done
It's a payment which precludes the having of fun

And you are always on mind
But hello, I've got a new partner riding with me
I'v got a new partner, hello

Now the sun's fading faster, we're ready to go
There's a skirt in the bedroom that's pleasantly low
And the loons on the moor, the fish in the flow
And my friends, my friends still will whisper hello
We all know what we know, it's a hard swath to mow
When you think like a hermit you forget what you know

And you are always on my mind
I've got a new partner, riding with me
I've got a new partner now."

Again, no sample. I included all of the lyrics because all I could find for a sample was this live version. It's Will Oldham, aka Bonnie "Prince" Billy, performing the song:



8. Camera Obscura: Books Written For Girls-I'm tempted to write all of the lyrics down for this one. Whew, it's amazing. A little gem I found accidentally, but couldn't have come at a better time in my life. It's about disappointment, whether you are the disappointed or disappointer. It's about how things can appear to be one way, but in reality, it's much different. It's about that heartbreak that follows being let down. Just an amazing, touching song. And yes, I will include all of the lyrics because really, it is that good.

"You can compliment me on the style of my hair
GIve me marks out of ten for the clothes that I wear
You probably thought I had more upstairs.

I disappoint you.
Can't see through your perfect smile.

He likes to read books written for girls.
He prides himself on being a man of the world.
In the darkest of places he gets his thrills.

He will disappoint you
If you see through his perfect smile.

I think separation is okay.
You're no star to guide me anyway.
You only wanted me to play,
A fool...played by your rules.

Now my door has swollen from the rain.
God knows we'll never see her face again.
People get shattered in many ways.

They can disappoint you.
When you see through
Their perfect smile."


powered by ODEO

I got the song below from Camera Obscura's official site. It is a haunting remix of "Books Written For Girls". Enjoy this! It's simply amazing.

Listen

9. Death Cab For Cutie: A Lack of Color-Okay, this song is fantastic. I used to hate this band, for no real reason unfortunately. I just thought they were overhyped and had become too much of a symbol for that revolution of "indie-pop" that I so loathed. One day, I was at a friend's house and this song came on. I had to know who this band was. Of course, it ended up being none other than Death Cab. It didn't take me long to find many songs of theirs that I enjoyed and I quickly threw out all that I thought I knew of indie-pop. I apologized to the band for not giving them a chance sooner and vowed not to make that mistake again. "A Lack of Color" remains one of my favorites. It's about how we take things for granted, be it the amazing way our bodies work, ("...I really see you upside down. But my brain knows better, it picks you up and turns you around..."), or the people that we love and forget to appreciate. For me, this song is all about not knowing what you got till it's gone. Heartbreaking.

"All the girls in every girly magazine, can't make me feel any less alone. I'm reaching for the phone, to call a 703, on your machine, I slur a plea for you to come home. But I know it's too late, I should have given you a reason to stay."

Listen To Sample

10.Sufjan Stevens: For The Widows In Paradise, For The Fatherless In Ypsilanti-This is a classic and always makes it on my lists of depressing music. Amazing use of banjo and a wonderful voice. This song can mean so many different things. It is definitely religiously driven, but in an unobtrusive way. It could also be about a love and all that applies there. There's also a story floating around the internet that when this song was played live, the explanation of it was that Sufjan visited a town in Michigan called Paradise. It was an odd little town and there seemed to be no men. He said that he wrote this song, devising this story in his head that all the men had died in war, and the women were left behind and formed this community of mothers, sisters, daughters, grandmothers, and friends. They had their own world and took over.

With any interpretation, it's beautiful.

"I was dressed embarrassment. I was dressed in wine. If you had a part of me, will you take you're time? Even if I come back, even if I die, is there some idea to replace my life?"

Listen To Sample

As I finish this, I find still have more to add. There's so much wonderful music in this world! I love it. I'm sure more of these lists will come along in the future. Keep an eye out.

Smiles! Unicorns! Puppies! Cupcakes!

I listen to my iPod on shuffle and wonder when I fell into this coma of depressing music. There's no need to make sleep mixes anymore. The happy songs are so few and far between that I'm usually long asleep by the time any of them roll around. "Aw, that's sad," you might say. "She needs light in her life," you may suggest. You may even recommend me some of the best music ever to lift me out of my narcoleptic music slump. Well stop those interventions right now my friend. This is completely self-induced and I take any and all credit for any damage done to my psyche.

My favorite kind of depressing music is kind where the singer comes out of the speaker and jumps in your throat and all of the sudden, they make you want to cry because they're in you, or maybe are you. And you wonder if that's why you are so tired at work. Nights spent recording records and touring and your body is so shocked and emotionally tired that you just forget. You're pretty sure people would totally believe that it's just another artistic quirk of yours. Unwilling to speak of or even recongnize that this is your line of work. (You also wonder where those paychecks are and hope that your alter-ego didn't donate them to the environment because you have credit card bills.)

Back on track here. My iPod and its need of the music that makes you want to cry. It's the vocals that do it for me. I've never been a huge fan of ambient music, even when Sigur Ros ruled my school. Techno has never been my thing, and maybe not just because of the lack of vocals. I need to hear a person. I need to connect. I need to feel like they are struggling to get the next line out. This doesn't necessarily mean sleepy music or whiny lyrics. In fact, the more the music contradicts the lyrics, the better. The more hopeful and upbeat the music, paired with lyrics that rip you to shreds, the more I'll love it.

And when you're depressed, it's the best! I am a reveler. When I'm feeling low, I want to be surrounded by my most depressing music. I want to wallow and feel sorry for myself. I like to write down the lyrics to Bright Eyes songs. Almost always one of these lines will relate to me and make me want to write something myself. It's a cycle that I've come to love and appreciate.

Sad music really makes depression fun again.

I guess I don't always listen to the woe-is-me music. I do have some more upbeat bands that I listen to. (But even they sing about being lost, cheated on, or poor.)

I used to do the Song of the Moment in my sidebar. I was thinking about bringing it back, but maybe I'll just do it inside the actual blog and put a handy-dandy tag on it. "SOTM".

Okay, so all this talk about depressing music and my SOTM is actually not completely depressing. It's called "Mama's Room" by Under the Influence of Giants. Go here for a sample. You'll probably have to click on the song title to listen. I love all of their stuff, but currently this song is my fav. It inspired a late night, "making a grilled cheese and drinking a beer, dancing alone in my kitchen" routine the other night. Like I said earlier, the song is upbeat, but there's a lot more behind the lyrics. A song that can make me dance or cry? [Can't-compute-greatness.]

Check it out and let me know what you think.

This song is from their self-titled album.