My Episode (and Dream Car)

My episode is airing this weekend! My debut as editor on a real show that needed editing, vs the show I used to edit which was a format show and was just a lot of standups and segments strung together. But this show, (one which I am not naming because I don't want to be Googled in that capacity!), took a lot of work, and a lot of time, and even though it's not as good as I believe it maybe could have been had I had more time, (isn't that always the case?), it's my debut and I'm pretty freaking excited. So check out TLC at 8:30 on Saturday and see all my hard work come to fruition, (and the reason I haven't updated "Spark" lately). Anyway, I'm still trying to cash in my day off and having trouble doing so! Big day tomorrow with new deadlines for a new episode and then tomorrow night I'm going to my friend's movie premiere which, wait for it, will be my first red carpet event! And rumor has it the paps will be there. So who knows, maybe I'll be on wireimage or something. Doubtful! But you never know.

And for all the love I give LA, I really wish it would stop being cold and rainy. What happened to no seasons?!?!?!

Is anyone else obsessed with The Million Dollar Mission? Deal or No Deal, if you're wondering. Monday is the night, I believe. Pretty exciting.

Last item on my agenda is the dentist. I love my dentist, maybe because he's a self-proclaimed sadist or maybe because he's so darn cute with his Russian accent. Or maybe it's because he can do a filling in like twenty minutes flat. Anyway, he's amazing. And he always says, "Let's see how I'm going to torture you today," when he sits down. Okay, why do I find that so charming. Must be the accent. Nonetheless, I was so sore today after my "bigger than a filling, smaller than a crown" today. But it's over. And unfortunately, since I don't have dental insurance, I had to get a dental credit card, which pushes me further away from my dream of a Lexus IS350. I'm obsessed.

I present to you my car-crush:




It's even more beautiful in person.

What I Would Like To See

With election day looming, I thought it would be interesting to make a list of, (buzz word ahead), changes I'd like to see in this country:

STOP the tolerance of intolerance.

I'd like to see America once again adored by other countries and for me not be ashamed to say I'm an American.

I'd like to see America as an economic icon once again, and not just a cultural one, by bringing back the middle class.

I'd like my kids to grow up in a world that is greener and more focused on the environment so that their kids and their kids and their kids can enjoy the same world we enjoy every day.

I'd like to see equal rights for all Americans, from women making the same amount as men to gay couples being able to enjoy the same rights as straight ones.

I'd like to see an education system that encourages kids to stay in school.

I'd like to see less focus on the "war on drugs" and more focus on drug programs and after school care for children whose parents work.

I'd like to see less crowded prisons and more work camps for inmates to be better prepared to enter back into society.

I'd like to feel safe with a military at home, prepared to defend me and those around me.

I'd like this country's leaders to take a good long look at the Fall of Rome and take notes.

I'd like to see the national debt start declining, at the very least.

I'd like to see the end of tax breaks for jobs shipped overseas, and stop reading quotes like this in my paper:
“You can outsource a lot of activities and get them done just as well at a lower cost,” -Treasury Secretary John Snow

And lastly, and maybe most importantly, I'd like to see the end of the seperation of classes where the rich continue to get richer and the poorer continue to get poorer.

And did I mention, STOP THE TOLERANCE OF INTOLERANCE!!!

To Be Fair---

Equal Press!




Wanna watch something scary??? This is Dick Cheney in 1994 predicting the future in a Nostradamus kind of way, (kind of).

Okay So--

I was talking to a friend last night about my recent interest in religion, science, and politics. I was sort of dumbfounded at how this interest had seemed to take hold over night. He had the theory, (as the same thing happened to him last year), that once we were out of school, it was fun and work. Now that we've learned that balance, our minds are seeking more enlightenment.

Hence, this sudden interest. Anyway, if you're not into this, I understand. (Skip down to the best friends post I just refound and finally posted!) I hope this isn't overkill but I have one more thing to post tonight and then I'm done.



This is from HBO's Documentary entitled, "Friends of God: A Road Trip With Alexandra Pelosi"

The estimated 50 to 80 million evangelical Christians living in America today have become a formidable force in our culture and democracy. But the evangelical movement is a big tent. To try and get a better understanding of the range and diversity of this community, intrepid filmmaker Alexandra Pelosi hit the road to meet some evangelicals and learn about what their influence may mean for the future of the country.

I must quote "Friends" on this one:

PHOEBE: That's fine. Go ahead and scoff. You know, there're a lot of things that I don't believe in, but that doesn't mean they're not true.

JOEY: Such as?

PHOEBE: Like crop circles, or the Bermuda triangle, or evolution?

ROSS: Whoa, whoa, whoa. What, you don't, uh, you don't believe in evolution?

PHOEBE: Nah. Not really.

ROSS: You don't believe in evolution?

PHOEBE: I don't know, it's just, you know...monkeys, Darwin, you know, it's a, it's a nice story, I just think it's a little too easy.

ROSS: Too easy? Too...The process of every living thing on this planet evolving over millions of years from single-celled organisms, too easy?

PHOEBE: Yeah, I just don't buy it.

ROSS: Uh, excuse me. Evolution is not for you to buy, Phoebe. Evolution is scientific fact, like, like, like the air we breathe, like gravity.

PHOEBE: Ok, don't get me started on gravity.

ROSS: You uh, you don't believe in gravity?

PHOEBE: Well, it's not so much that you know, like I don't believe in it, you know, it's just...I don't know, lately I get the feeling that I'm not so much being pulled down as I am being pushed.

Best-est-est-est

(Just found this and I'm not sure why I never posted. I wrote this entry last January. Better late than never!)

A best friend. We all want one. At one point or another in our lives, we thought we've found one. We might think we have one now. You may. Best friends are these idolized relationships that can rarely live up to the expectations we give them.

They want to be the ones that you can tell anything to. They tell you everything. They know all your secrets and you, theirs. You go to dinner, movies; you laugh at all the same jokes, you love the same music. They are you, only better. And they'd say the same about you if someone asked. They'd never not call when they say they will, and they're by your side before you have to ask. They know what makes you sad and avoid these subjects like the plague. A best friend brings your favorite dessert over when you tell them you've had a bad day at work. Boys never come between you, and they're there for you even if it means canceling a big date. These are the best friends we want. These are the best friends we want to be. These are the best friends we'll never have. These are the best friends we'll never be.

Years ago, in middle school or even before, my friends and I would rank our friends on a scale of "est"s. Sure, being a best friend was good. Being a best-est-est-est friend, was better. We'd give an extra "est" for each time that person made us feel like we mattered. Or because they were beside us while we were making the list. Or they'd bump up our popularity points.

We'd claim best friends forever but our lists would change daily, weekly, monthly. In the next two years, many of the people on the list would have stolen our sister's bathing suit or our favorite necklace or our boyfriend. The list would change and evolve. And one day, we'd stop making these lists, calling them childish and irrelevant. But it was still there. In our heads. And each time we saw them laughing with someone else, passing us by in the halls, being someone else's biology partner, we'd demote them in our heads. We'd vow that we could find someone to replace them. But then they'd be back, and could somehow make it back to the top of our lists in a few seconds. We'd deny such a list exists.

We've all had a best friend. We can all remember the moment that they stabbed us in the back clearly. We still feel the sting. We remember when they let us down, or when they found a new best friend. We remember when we drifted apart. We remember when we found someone to fill this new-found void. We remembered to hold ourselves a little closer, and this time, maybe we could be the one to let go first. Maybe this time, we'd have someone else lined up to fill the position when we were pushed away.

One day we'd look back at our best friends and wonder if such a thing ever existed. If there was one friend who was better than all the rest. Someone who fulfilled our image of them. Fulfilled the role of "best".

We want to believe that we'd be a great best friend. But we all disappoint. We all screw up, and we all get blinded. We forget, we move on, we let go. We forget to call or ask about their day. Sure friendship is about forgiveness, but should a best friend be able to screw up? If we are called the best friend, shouldn't we be the best at being a friend that we can be. And is anything short of that a failure? Is that why they're so fleeting? Expectations?

One day we let go of pretenses. We stop having best friends in a move of self-defense or something else. We have friends. We have good friends, work friends, acquaintances, and sometimes even great friends. We forget to sign our notes with the few extra "est"s in fear of disappointing or disappointment. We stop creating an impossible image. We stop believing in best friends. We think it's sad to let such a tradition die but we are tired.

(Secretly, we still hope they exist, even if the image looks a little different. We keep one eye open like a pre-teen on Christmas. We try not to be too disppointed when our parents have a milk mustache in the morning and their breath smells suspiciously of Oreos.)

Oy With The Deep Already!

So oddly enough, a couple of friends of mine got into a similar debate as the one linked below via their Myspace blog. I listened in and was completely in awe. This quote was born of that and gives me chills! Just wanted to share:


"I was attempting to align the idea that religion and science are actually attempting the same ends; they both strive to explain the unexplainable. They both strive to understand that grain of sand at the end of NEVERENDING STORY and the true irony is that neither one will ever fully be able to do so.

So, if that is a choice between limiting my mind to understand God or limitlessly expanding my mind to find God... Then my faith is in the limitless."


I'm loving these conversations about the marriage of religion and science. The debates will only grow more plentiful as we learn more and more about our world.

The idea that science is a religion in and of itself, is a concept that had it been a snake, I would have been bitten. Meaning, any sort of dogmatic statements of the beginnings of life on this world, (that really, we know so little about), is taking a giant leap of faith. Be it following a God or following a text book.

Also this from Einstein who was interested in the joining of these two:

"Imagination is more important than knowledge."

"The eternal mystery of the world is its comprehensibility."

"Science without religion is lame. Religion without science is blind."

"As far as the laws of mathematics refer to reality, they are not certain, as far as they are certain, they do not refer to reality."

"Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former."

"We should take care not to make the intellect our god; it has, of course, powerful muscles, but no personality.":

Thanks Jason and Nate for the great conversation.

Debate

I want to share how I have spent the last two hours of my evening with you. I have been watching a debate that has equally befuddled, amused, astounded, and justified my own beliefs and concerns. I internally debated with myself whether or not to post this here, for reasons that may or may not be completely obvious to you. The debate linked below is titled "Religion, Politics, and the End of the World".

I urge you to listen to the two opposing views and the thought-provoking views that lie within, if you feel you have the stomach for it. It's equally entertaining and informative and it's one of those things that I just haven't been able to tear myself away from for the past couple of hours, (with interruptions, of course).

For those of who I shall not name, but most likely, you know who you are, I assure you that if you can stomach the first segment, you will find your saving grace in his debater. It's unlikely you will get nothing from this, even if it is a better understanding of the War in Iraq and the ideas that lie within. One of the most intriguing and mind numbing moments of this debate is when Hedges discusses his experience in Iraq and how he believes we have handled things poorly. His own experience of the reactions from the Muslim world on the events of 9/11, and how, in essence, we manged to turn a formable ally into one of our greatest enemies.

I urge you to listen in if you so wish, and to not be scared off by the somewhat harsh introduction to the first of two debaters (the one he gives himself, mind you, after the terribly long 6 minute intro). The larger argument is one that is primarily introduced in part 2.

But for mere reasons of fundamental indiscretions that could serve to, in essence, nullify this debate for you, I warn you it is not for the faint of heart. Especially the first segment. Just warning you - the first segment is very athetistic in nature and I don't want to catch you off guard. It's equally important to not let the obvious difference of fundamental beliefs cheapen the core of the intention of this conversation. It's wonderful that discussions like this are even taking place today, and whether we'd like to admit it or not, both of the guys make astounding arguments about current events, most notably, the war in Iraq.

The argument of the debate itself is basically religion's role in today's conflicts. In one corner, (and I am very hesitant to put any words in any mouths, but this is from what I gathered), an atheist who believes religion is tearing our world apart, in corner number two, a New York Times reporter who has spent years and years studying religion, especially in the Middle East, and believes that the "Terror" problems of today comes from a class of people who are lost and in despair and are gathered up by terror organizations who veil their intentions behind a wall of promises and acceptance. Sparks will fly, (and do).


Religion, Politics, and The End of the World

Ehhh.

I woke up this morning and was pretty sure it was Friday. I sadly assured myself it was only Thursday. When I got to work, everyone was walking around with doughnuts. Since we have doughnuts at work every Friday, I was once again confused. Hopeful, I asked what day it was. Thursday. Disappointment. And Valentine's day. Again with the disappointment. Ugh, really. Only Thursday? I'm so tired and just blah.

I'm ready for the weekend. Soooo ready.

Ehh.

Ehh.

Oh yeah, my episode is locked and is going to online tomorrow. And all the stress has hit me like a ton of bricks.

I accidentally pulled my computer to the ground today. Hard. How it is still working, I will never know. Oh, and I've almost lived in LA for a year. Insane. I'll have to do a Since I've Lived in LA Part 2.

Good night. I'm watching Friends now and am relieved to be home. Now if I can only get my toilet fixed. Yeah, real long story, but just another casualty of my insane work schedule I've had lately. I figured I've worked about 67 hours in the last week. Guh. Is my math right??!?

8+10+16+11+10+12

If tomorrow is an average day, my grand total for the week will be 76. 76?! That seems insane. Oh yeah, it is.

Ehh.

Inspired.

"We know the battle ahead will be long. But always remember, no matter what obstacles stand in our way, nothing stands in the way of the power of billions of voices calling for change. We have been told we can not do this by a chorus of cynics, they will only grow louder and more dissonant. We've been asked to pause for a reality check, we've been warned against offering the people of this nation false hope. But in the unlikely story that is America, there has never been anything false, about hope...We will remember that there is something happening in America. That we are not as divided as our politics suggest. That we are one people, that we are one nation. And together, we will begin the next great chapter in the America's story with three words, that will ring from coast to coast, from sea to shining sea - Yes, we can!"

Think Before You Speak

Okay, as I was saying in an earlier post, I really like Mike Birbiglia. He has this one thing where he talks about not having a batter's circle for your brain, and where there is no filter between, (Lightbulb) and Batter up!

I'm still tired and having much difficulty formulating sentences.

Okay, well the other day, I was thinking back to a conversation I had with my boss. It was one of those times where you think back on something and it's like, 'Ohhhh, that probably didn't sound great.' The conversation went something like this:

Boss to me: I smoked for ten years and just recently quit.

Me: It's hard.

Boss: Very. Do you drink?

Me: I do, but I don't have a problem.

What?!?! "I do, but I don't have a problem"?!?! Who says that other than people with a problem!!!!

I can never be late to work ever again.

I really don't have a problem. Really. (Yeah. Trying to explain only makes it worse.)

Going to sleep for real now. I wrote my tired blog entry and then got dragged to a Guitar Hero tournament in which, because I was friends with the people who organize and host it, free food and drink! Very nice. It was great to go up to the bar to pay and being told, "Your tab is taken care of." But as fun as that was, it got in the way of my eyes closed time. Resume.

End scene.

Forklift.

Shootnanigans.

Stiked.

Grain of seed.

Pollit.

Snipe.

Forklift.

Lemon.

Aw, Lemon.

That was a stream of consciousness. Now I'm going to go for the stream of unconsciousness.

--------------------------------

Zzzzz

I'm tired! That's all. I'm tired. In addition to working all weekend, I worked 9:30am (okay more like 10) to 2 am yesterday. Why is the TV industry filled with so much stress? It's like the end of the world if a deadline isn't made. Seriously. From lunch yesterday to about thirty minutes ago, I had been surviving on Protein bars and coffee. Seriously, all for the sake of one little air date!

Buttttttt, the result of all this is I sent my very first cut to a Network for the very first time. Wooo. It's scary, I'm not going to lie. I'm thirty percent scared, thirty percent relieved, and forty percent tired. Does that add up to a hundred? I hope so. If not, I blame the tiredness. So blood and tears shed for this thing, (and tons of "f" bombs), so now, when and if it does air, it will stay on my DVR forever. And you will be expected to watch.

Also, I've been keeping a log of all my google searches. I will reveal the top ten on my two year, yes two year!, anniversary!

Large Lemon

I need help. This is how I spent an hour of "work time" today.



The Adventures of the Large Lemon

I'm obsessed with this beautiful monstrosity.








Is it just me or is there a heavenly light emanating from her?

In My Dreams

I wrote a hilarious/informative/intriguing/amazing blog entry last night, (you know, basically the best kind). I felt so great about myself and cherished the fact that I'd have people laughing this morning. Well, I wake up to realize it was all a dream. And as disappointing as that was, it's even sadder that my mind chose this dream as the most pivotal for me to remember. I think I need new dreams. Or a life. Or a doctor.

New, (to me at least), comedian in which has quickly been placed in the "I'll have his babies" column of my life organizer:







This next one, someone animated, but I just love the dreams stuff that comes after the hotel thing!



Oh man! I love him.

What is my wash?

I was trying to say "Where is my key?" and instead, in what can only be described as Ms BCT's slaughter of another language, 2008, (previously on: 2003 trip to France where I insisted on saying "Si" instead of "Oui", constantly!), I said, "What is my wash?". I was laughed at, to say the least. Estupido American.

Yes, this was during my poor attempt to learn Spanish from the nice valet man at work, who may or may not be inappropriate at times. ("Yo es no tu amore!" <---incorrect I'm sure, but you get the drift).

i also need to remember to say "Por favor"! How rude am I, demanding my key like that?

I'm going to get political on you for a second. Did you vote today? Super Tuesday. Hillary won CA. Sad! I think I love Obama. He's one of the most amazing speech-givers of our century. Fantastic speaker. Charismatic and so sensible. I like the man. I feel like he could be a landmark Pres. But that's just me. To each their own. We'll see what the people want I guess.

I'm just so tired of hearing of all these things that have been going on in this country. How so slowly, yet surely, we've lost our middle class. The best way this can be demonstrated in a tangible form is looking, and comparing, the Forbes "Richest People in America" list today and twenty years ago. Twenty years ago, the top 10 were millionaires. Today, BILLIONAIRES. Think about it. And freaking tax breaks for companies who send work to other countries??!? And, come on people, war on terror. I'm a pretty conservative democrat/independent, but can't our government see that the Middle East is getting billions and billions of dollars for oil exporting? Where do you guys think a lot of that money goes? It would be naive to think that at least some of it doesn't fund terriorism. Okay, so using our brains instead of our guns, why don't we put money into searching for alternate fuel sources. Not only one that would be better for the environment, but one that would cut terrorism, at least down, from the source! And while America is no longer an economic icon, it is a cultural one. Where we lead, the world would follow. So why hasn't this happened? Why haven't small moves at least been made in this direction? Well this is just my hypothesis, but I believe it has something to do with the billions of dollars oil companies in America would lose. (The money would stay in America, but go elsewhere.) Which is suspect only because of the close oil relationships in our White House. Sound like a crazy theory? Just think about it! It makes so much sense, it's scary! I think America has had enough old, white men in the White House. It's a new world and I believe that we need to get old, incestuous money out of the White House and bring someone in who can perhaps give a more unbiased view to some of our biggest issues today. And I'm tired of old, white men. (Have I mentioned that?) Not to mention the completely enraging civil liberties issues of today. It's our generation's slavery to a certain degree. It's prejudist and mind blowing at how small minded people in this day and age can be.

Anyway, just checking in. Hope your voice was heard today or in the upcoming primaries in your state.